Hey guys! If real world relationships weren't complicated enough, now the world of Facebook has made things even more complicated. YAY. I spend a lot of time thinking about Facebook and how it's emergence in 2004 has completely changed the way we interact with people. I was about to say "the way we interact with loved ones" but then I realized that I have approximately 600 friends on there, and this is after a major "friend" deletion, and many of these people I do not love. (Some I do, so don't get your feelings hurt, people.)
Thus, the topic of this post. I have, several times, attempted to widdle down this friends list. But... it gets complicated. I have issues. A friend deletion is serious business. What if you see them somewhere? Awkward. And there are so many types of Facebook friends, and each plays a role, a purpose if you will, in the world of Facebook.
Family. Duh. Parents. Sisters, brothers, cousins. Aunt, uncles. Maybe nephews and nieces, depending on your age and/or the degree of parenting intervention on the Facebook front (I know of 10 year olds with a Facebook account).
Parents. This deserves a category of its own. I remember when my mom got on Facebook (when it was previously primarily for college students). This is certainly not a bad thing (as I know my mom is also reading this blog, hi mam!!), it did shift the paradigm a little bit with the emergence of important family members. Cryptic country song lyrics could be rebutted (ARE YOU OKAY?!?!?!); complaints are given obvious and welcome solutions; etc.
True Friends. These are the people who know things about you without reading about it on Facebook. The ones that know what cryptic country lyrics are referring to without you saying so. The ones that would still be your friends if Facebook didn't exist.
Friends you used to be friends with but aren't really anymore. This is another fun one. Sarcasm! To me, this is like looking at old pictures of yourself when you were super skinny. It just makes you sad to see pictures of them. But such is life. Life happens, and either the friendship lasts or fades away.
Friend's Parents. This is an interesting one. One would assume that if your parents are on Facebook, now your friends' parents are on Facebook too!
Your Parent's Friends. Mom's bffe. Dad's coworker. Maybe one of your parents' neighbors. These are people that you don't really know but you don't want to not know. They are your parents' friends, and their interest in your day-to-day is thoughtful.
Co-workers. This goes for current and past. I have found some of my most treasured friendships at work. Think about it; you spend most of your time there. But there are also co-workers who you would rather not share oxygen with all day. Sometimes you have to be friends with them too.
Exes. That is unless the relationship was too recent, traumatic or psycho. Then those exes are on the block list. You know it's nice to see what some exes are up to.
Exes' friends. At one point in time, your exes friends were your friends. If you are lucky some of them still are. But chances are you have groups of friends on Facebook you know primarily through an ex.
High school friends. Do we even need high school reunions anymore? No? Ok.
People from high school you didn't even talk to. These are the people who request your friendship and you have NO idea who they are, but realize that you have 93 mutual friends that all went to your high school. You rack your brain; you look at their pictures; maybe even message another pal from high school... but you have no clue who this person is.
People from high school you didn't even talk to, but you do now. This has been one of my favorite groups of Facebook friends. I realized in my many wise years (HA!) that there may have been moments in high school where I was a prissy bitch. There I said it! Facebook has allowed me to have friendships now that I'm more of an adult and less of a biotch. :)
Strangers who you have met online. If you are like me, and have a strong presence online, this group is big. For me it includes other bloggers, pinup people, photographers, other models, and moms living in Chicago who I don't even know. That's the crazy thing about Facebook, y'all. Some of these people I honest to goodness consider real friends. I don't know what that says about me, but I am being honest.
Friends you make when going out who you think you will be BFFEs with but never talk to again. I know I'm not the only one! A night out with a group of gal pals, So-And-So is so neat, oh you have facebook! Let's be friends! Selfies! I'm going to tag you!!! And never, ever talk to you again.
People you delete but keep adding you back. And because you are a nice person, you keep adding them back. Neat, they don't get the hint!
The people who invite you to play games every/single/day. These people could also fit in other categories. While I could give a rat's hiney about the game requests, I know people who think this offense warrants friend deletion!
The people who post selfies. GUILTY AS CHARGED. Hey, confidence is a good thing, people, right?? Right. Ahem. :)
The people you aren't friends with, but you search them every once in awhile to see if their profile is accessible. Before you go off thinking "oh, Tara's crazy" I don't ever do this. ;) But if I did, it might be people you don't like, significant other's exes, your exes on the block list, and even your exes' exes. Thanks Facebook for being SO thorough in our ability to stalk.
Your close friends who don't have Facebook. You have moved 3 times, gotten married and had a kid, and this person might not know any of this has happened because they aren't on Facebook. Good luck continuing that friendship when you finally touch base with that person.
Y'all... please tell me I speak the truth on this, or else maybe I'm just special! But this is how I see Facebook and all of it's facets of friends. Like I said before, it's complicated. The world of Facebook "friends."
Thus, the topic of this post. I have, several times, attempted to widdle down this friends list. But... it gets complicated. I have issues. A friend deletion is serious business. What if you see them somewhere? Awkward. And there are so many types of Facebook friends, and each plays a role, a purpose if you will, in the world of Facebook.
Family. Duh. Parents. Sisters, brothers, cousins. Aunt, uncles. Maybe nephews and nieces, depending on your age and/or the degree of parenting intervention on the Facebook front (I know of 10 year olds with a Facebook account).
Parents. This deserves a category of its own. I remember when my mom got on Facebook (when it was previously primarily for college students). This is certainly not a bad thing (as I know my mom is also reading this blog, hi mam!!), it did shift the paradigm a little bit with the emergence of important family members. Cryptic country song lyrics could be rebutted (ARE YOU OKAY?!?!?!); complaints are given obvious and welcome solutions; etc.
True Friends. These are the people who know things about you without reading about it on Facebook. The ones that know what cryptic country lyrics are referring to without you saying so. The ones that would still be your friends if Facebook didn't exist.
Friends you used to be friends with but aren't really anymore. This is another fun one. Sarcasm! To me, this is like looking at old pictures of yourself when you were super skinny. It just makes you sad to see pictures of them. But such is life. Life happens, and either the friendship lasts or fades away.
Friend's Parents. This is an interesting one. One would assume that if your parents are on Facebook, now your friends' parents are on Facebook too!
Your Parent's Friends. Mom's bffe. Dad's coworker. Maybe one of your parents' neighbors. These are people that you don't really know but you don't want to not know. They are your parents' friends, and their interest in your day-to-day is thoughtful.
Co-workers. This goes for current and past. I have found some of my most treasured friendships at work. Think about it; you spend most of your time there. But there are also co-workers who you would rather not share oxygen with all day. Sometimes you have to be friends with them too.
Exes. That is unless the relationship was too recent, traumatic or psycho. Then those exes are on the block list. You know it's nice to see what some exes are up to.
Exes' friends. At one point in time, your exes friends were your friends. If you are lucky some of them still are. But chances are you have groups of friends on Facebook you know primarily through an ex.
High school friends. Do we even need high school reunions anymore? No? Ok.
People from high school you didn't even talk to. These are the people who request your friendship and you have NO idea who they are, but realize that you have 93 mutual friends that all went to your high school. You rack your brain; you look at their pictures; maybe even message another pal from high school... but you have no clue who this person is.
People from high school you didn't even talk to, but you do now. This has been one of my favorite groups of Facebook friends. I realized in my many wise years (HA!) that there may have been moments in high school where I was a prissy bitch. There I said it! Facebook has allowed me to have friendships now that I'm more of an adult and less of a biotch. :)
Strangers who you have met online. If you are like me, and have a strong presence online, this group is big. For me it includes other bloggers, pinup people, photographers, other models, and moms living in Chicago who I don't even know. That's the crazy thing about Facebook, y'all. Some of these people I honest to goodness consider real friends. I don't know what that says about me, but I am being honest.
Friends you make when going out who you think you will be BFFEs with but never talk to again. I know I'm not the only one! A night out with a group of gal pals, So-And-So is so neat, oh you have facebook! Let's be friends! Selfies! I'm going to tag you!!! And never, ever talk to you again.
People you delete but keep adding you back. And because you are a nice person, you keep adding them back. Neat, they don't get the hint!
The people who invite you to play games every/single/day. These people could also fit in other categories. While I could give a rat's hiney about the game requests, I know people who think this offense warrants friend deletion!
The people who post selfies. GUILTY AS CHARGED. Hey, confidence is a good thing, people, right?? Right. Ahem. :)
The people you aren't friends with, but you search them every once in awhile to see if their profile is accessible. Before you go off thinking "oh, Tara's crazy" I don't ever do this. ;) But if I did, it might be people you don't like, significant other's exes, your exes on the block list, and even your exes' exes. Thanks Facebook for being SO thorough in our ability to stalk.
Your close friends who don't have Facebook. You have moved 3 times, gotten married and had a kid, and this person might not know any of this has happened because they aren't on Facebook. Good luck continuing that friendship when you finally touch base with that person.
Y'all... please tell me I speak the truth on this, or else maybe I'm just special! But this is how I see Facebook and all of it's facets of friends. Like I said before, it's complicated. The world of Facebook "friends."
Ha! Totally agree! :)
ReplyDeleteHa! Thank you for validating my feelings here Megan!!! The whole time I was writing, I was wondering "Do I sound cuckoo?" :)
DeleteHahaha! This is so true...never realized how many people fall into the Stranger category, including myself! Good job summing up Facebook, they should add you to their payroll...lol
ReplyDeleteI have a ton of people in that category as well!!! And yes, facebook where's my check?!?!? LOL thanks!
DeleteYOU better continue our friendship missy!!!!!! lumtlietidhaf ;)
ReplyDeletelumtlibayhai - FIGURE THAT ONE OUT loveme
ReplyDelete